The Battle of the School tie

I do not wear ties.  I find it more comfortable to wear an open neck shirt.  I think there may have been a couple of occasions in my youth when my mum insisted I wear a tie, but in general, the clothing accessory was never an essential for my daily wardrobe.

I am now cringing at the memory of having worn in early youth a faux bow on a thin piece of elastic that was pulled over the head and worn around the neck.  I could not have been more than four or five years of age. 

However, when I achieved secondary school age a tie formed part of my daily uniform.  Although it was in no way an essential item of clothing unlike shoes or trousers, for instance, it was deemed by the school as a necessity to be worn on all occasions - physical exercise and sport excepted.

I may have taken to wearing ties, perhaps, if one’s teachers had not been insistent upon wearing it knotted at the collar with one’s top button fastened.  I would bite off a button or two from the top of my shirts and leave my tie at home.

A tie would be presented to me each morning during form registration and a battle of wills would commence.  Their position was that a tie was part of the school uniform and must be worn by all pupils as it made the individual and the body of students look smart and orderly.  The school tie, it was claimed, helped to maintain a smart, orderly and disciplined uniformed identity.

My position, with the greatest respect, was that I found wearing a tie restrictive and uncomfortable.  My schooldays were far from the best days of my life (my days away from school were far better).  I attended with a reluctance just to keep my mother happy.  My teachers were aware fully of the torments I suffered. 

By my presence daily, they could see how willing I was to attend.  I was happy to attend school tieless and participate in the lessons; or I would be less than happy to attend school, forced to wear a tie and sit idle in either classroom or hall. 

Wearing a tie, I would do no work, remaining idle and possibly ignorant; without a tie, my behaviour improves immediately and I become an active and productive participant. 

As a compromise, as long as I could wear an open necked shirt, with time, the wearing of a tie could become a daily delight.

The compromise was accepted.  The battle of the school tie was settled without bloodshed and a moral victory for both parties.  Time may be a great healer; however, it never made the wearing of a tie a daily delight for me.

It may be a form of post-traumatic stress or it may be just an old man being silly but on occasions, usually in the warmer months but not exclusively, I still get flashbacks of that conflict whenever I see office workers with their top button fastened and tie knotted at the collar.

I have not worn a tie since my long gone schooldays and I hope I am never called upon to do so.